As I mentioned in two previous blog entries, I believe that there are 3 invisible forces at work when we are networking. We've already addressed the "force of repulsion" and the "force of attraction". Now, let's address the third ... the force of reciprocity!
Reciprocity is simple ... you do something nice for me and I'll do something nice for you. Or is it REALLY that simple?! If it were that simple, then why do so many of my clients complain about the fact that they give referrals to people and never get anything in return? I hear it alot and it can become very tiresome for people. It can drive a wedge between two business people.
Reciprocity is based on the level of commitment to the relationship. It's based on the perceived value of the relationship. It's a built in win-win situation when it works! So, why doesn't it happen more frequently.
One reason is because people are building relationships with the wrong people. Let's face it ... if bankers prove to be a good referral source for you ... not every banker will do. If you believe otherwise, you'll end up wasting your time with the wrong people and the force of reciprocity will be working against you rather than with you. When you find the RIGHT banker (for example) that person will have a high commitment to the relationship. Among other things, they will give you their time and energy towards helping your business grow.
When you're networking with the RIGHT people, the force of reciprocity becomes a non-issue. If you've been facing a closed door when it comes to reciprocity with your relationships, perhaps it's time to analyze and evaluate your relationships.
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